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12 November, 2001

TOO MUCH SUSHI AND TEA

It's wonderful that so much Japanese culture, from anime to wasabi, has become mainstream in western popular culture.

These variations are heresy, desecrations, monstrous hybrids of a multi-cultural, mass-marketed era.
For too many years, Japanese have been ridiculed for mimicking all things western, and it's high time the two-way nature of cultural exchanges is acknowledged. I've written about it before -- I thought it was cool when sushi restaurants began sprouting up everywhere, even in the suburbs, and I thought it was great that green tea, something I've sipped all my life, is now the big fad in healthy beverages.

But like the Japanese, who have at times been accused of taking western culture to extremes, I think some of the obsessions over all things "Japonica" is getting a bit out of control.

For starters, it's bugged me for some time now that sushi served in many places is simply not very good. I don't want to say outright that non-Japanese don't know how to make sushi, but … ooops! I guess I said it outright. No, really, I'm sure there are Japanese who make lousy sushi too.

But with "sushi making kits" available at gourmet supermarkets and classes taught through local adult schools, there are way too many amateurs out there who think they know sushi like the pros.

And there are too many pros out there who make sushi like amateurs, working at phony "Japanese" chains like the Denver-based "Tokyo Joe's," where well-scrubbed collegiate kids serve up bowls of undercooked rice topped with over-flavored meat, with a couple of lame kinds of "sushi" as side orders. The sushi is bland, and you won't find any real varieties with sashimi. That would be too scary, so instead they serve the ubiquitous California roll, with crab meat, avocado and rice on the outside of the roll. Rice on the outside of the roll - I see that and know immediately it's not real, authentic or Japanese. Avocado on sushi? Puh-leeeeaze.

The most common problem with amateurs making sushi is that the rice isn't flavored with the seasoned rice vinegar that is what gives sushi rice its distinctive flavor. It's such a disappointment to bite into sushi and have it be just plain rice. That makes it another dish, onigiri, which are plain rice balls often stuffed with something in the middle, like a bit of salty salmon or a pickled plum. I like onigiri too, but not when I'm expecting sushi.

The other dire mistake is poorly-cooked rice. Japanese style rice is not like Rice-A-Roni or Uncle Ben's rice, and it's not even like the usually drier Chinese style. Especially for sushi, rice has to be sticky, but not too sticky, soft but not mushy.

Just the other day I had some inari-zushi from Whole Foods, the very popular natural foods supermarket. The taste was perfect, but the rice was hard and undercooked. At least the fried tofu pouch was overstuffed, so I couldn't gripe too much - it filled me up.

A few months ago, I ate at the very expensive and well-recommended buffet at Bellaggio, one of the more sumptuous of Las Vegas hotel casinos. I avoided the sushi on my first run, but the Hispanic sushi chef insisted I try his nori-maki, fat rolls stuffed with various ingredients. I took a couple of pieces and regretted it. The rice was overcooked and mushy, and it had no vinegary flavor. Even the stuff in the middle seemed to have no taste. I couldn't finish them after a couple of bites, and spent the rest of dinner avoiding the Hispanic sushi chef.

Not long after the Vegas fiasco, I had a very nice Sunday brunch at a fancy Colorado Springs restaurant, the Sunbird, and against my better judgment, tried a piece of their sushi, which the Caucasian servers were very proud of. It was beyond overcooked - the rice was more like porridge, and soaked through the nori so it was difficult to pick up by the time I got it to the table. To make things worse, there was - of course - nary a bit of vinegary bite to the mush.

I know I'm being grumpy. It's not all bad news. For instance, I have found decent sushi, even to my surprise, from some of the companies that sell pre-packaged sushi combinations at grocery stores. One such company is operated by a Korean woman who makes awesome sushi. She's become our choice for large trays at parties and family dinners. That is, if my mom or Erin's grandmother aren't supplying the sushi.

But, I digress. Back to my original point: It's great that sushi has become commonplace in American diets, but I hope a level of quality and authenticity is maintained so that its Japanese roots won't become all but lost to diners.

I'm also concerned about green tea, which isn't solely a Japanese product but one that is at the foundation of culture and social interaction throughout Asia.

I once wrote about how great it was that green tea is now becoming known as a healthful drink, and available at more and more restaurants. Even familiar western brands such as the US company Celestial Seasonings and the UK company Bigelow were selling green tea.

But now, I'm embarrassed to say that both companies have gone too far.

I grew up with basically three types of green tea: The plain, bitter and very healthy basic green tea, the mellower, darker, roasted "hoji-cha" and "genmai-cha," which is green tea with little tiny rice crackers adding a toasted flavor.

Maybe I'm being closed-minded about this, but now the major manufacturers are adding all kinds of wild flavors to green tea to market its health benefits to the western palate. Celestial Seasonings sells an "Authentic Green Tea" (which is very good, by the way) but they also sell nine other types, including Antioxidant Green Tea with vitamins A, C and E and a citrus flavor, a Chamomile Green Tea, Mandarin Orchard with mandarin orange and passionfruit, a Mint Green Tea, Emerald Gardens with plum and passionfruit flavors added, a Lemon Zinger Green Tea and Honey Lemon Ginseng Green Tea.

Bigelow packages green tea in peach, lemon, mint and mango flavors, and, in a bizarre variation, the company makes versions of their most popular teas, Constant Comment and Earl Grey, with green tea.

To all of this I say: YUCK!

These variations are heresy, desecrations, monstrous hybrids of a multi-cultural, mass-marketed era. I assume that the horrible flavors will pass like a typhoon and green tea will once again settle down into being the drink that represents thousands of years of Asian civilization, not the fad of the day.

If this is how Asian culture will be absorbed into western society, I'll pass. I've had enough of phony sushi and weird green tea.

 


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